It's relative poo

In a nutshell, I really want to know, what the heck it is that makes this dog think a great steaming pile of crap is filet mignon? It really doesn't matter if it's his or the cat (JJ's) , in fact, JJ's is so much more "DEVINE" of him, because it seems, the kitty crystals, well that is just like sprinkling candy shells on the stuff. Then to just run on up to any human, and demand a big loving smooch, really! Bandit...you need to sit and watch Pink Flamingos, because you have obviously stripped a page from the script. UGH!